Divorces that involve children and disputed custody rights follow a three-step process. After meeting the attorney and strategizing the battle, parties can be expected to participate in discovery to ultimately settle the case — by agreement or by trial. The most important difference in a divorce involving children is what is called the Temporary Orders hearing.

A temporary order hearing usually occurs 2 to 4 weeks after the initial filing of the case and is usually heard before an associate judge. This hearing takes place to decide issues of temporary custody arrangements during the trial process, the preservation of important financial documents, the amount and frequency of child support payments, and other issues that might come up during the divorce proceedings.

Don’t be tricked. Despite the name “temporary order,” in practice, it is very difficult to change essential declarations of this order. This is why your attorney needs to know all of the major facts of your case up-front. He or she can help you make a strong case at the temporary order hearing, increasing your chances of more time with your child later on.

Each party is required to disclose, through discovery, certain financial and personal information in order for both parties to be able to make informed, rational decisions regarding child support and custody. Sometimes, courts are unable to assess the best interest of the child. For example, one parent may accuse the other parent of family violence, child neglect, or drug addiction. In these scenarios, courts are free to appoint professionals such as court-appointed psychologists, child advocates, licensed professional counselors, psychiatrists, parent facilitators, attorneys-ad-litem and others to examine either the children or the parents, or both.

While the experts’ recommendations in their final report to the court are not conclusive or binding upon the presiding family judge, judges do rely on experts — especially on those experts that were appointed by the court — to assist in making a decision on the best interests of the child.

Of course, each party has a right to choose their own experts to corroborate or challenge the court-appointed experts. Some of these party-appointed experts have a very long relationship with the court and may impact the judge’s analysis.

Like all litigation, divorces and custody disputes end with either an agreement between the parties or by trial. In the majority of cases, an event called mediation achieves a settlement.

Mediations have several advantages. Unlike the more hostile trial setting, mediations take place in a friendly, casual, and private environment. This atmosphere and the experience of the mediator often expedite results. Instead of blaming and denunciating each other, the mediator is result-oriented and will prohibit any form of fighting or arguing between the parties, even if this means that the two parties are in separate rooms and the mediator just walks back and forth with suggestions until agreement is reached.

If the parties find a resolution of their issues, the mediator will present an irrevocable and binding mediation settlement agreement for the parties’ signatures. The mediation settlement agreement will then be incorporated into the final divorce decree. Note that mediations can place take at any point — from the day one party filed for divorce to the night before trial. All it takes to conduct mediation is the willingness of both parties to mediate their disputes with a neutral third party, the mediator. Routinely, courts order the parties to mediate before allowing them to go to trial.

Trial. When all attempts to settle have failed, your case will then proceed to trial. Trials are always heard by the district judge, and may involve a jury if you or your spouse has requested one. A family law trial will involve the same features as other civil trials. Integral parts of the trial include testimony from both parties as well as any other witnesses (including any expert witnesses) as well as opening and closing statement by the attorneys. The judge or jury will then resolve the issues based upon their understanding of the facts as applied to the relevant law. The results of the trial are final and binding. In few instances, it may be advisable to analyze the merits of an appeal of the judge’s or jury’s decision.

Statistically, trials in family cases are rare. About 95% of all divorces are settled before and instead of a trial. Nonetheless, in a great number of cases the threat of trial and litigation, the threat of putting the other side under oath, and the idea of telling a judge or jury the real side of the story might serve as such a great deterrence that it might be the only avenue to end the dispute.